Tools to Make Thanksgiving and the Holidays
Not So Challenging
The Holidays are a time to throw caution into the wind. To say F*#@ It and eat and drink more than you know is healthy for you. I'm not saying you have to be a tea totaler, I just want you to honor yourself and whatever you have planned to continue on this journey of well-being. Well-being comes from within you, not from things and people outside of yourself. People don't make you happy, your thoughts about them make you happy. Drinking doesn't make you happy your thoughts about drinking make you happy (or miserable).
Here are my tools for you to employ to make Thanksgiving the holiday you planned it to be for you.
1. Planning ahead and engaging your decision making brain (pre-frontal cortex) is the BEST thing you can do for yourself.
2. Predict your obstacles. i.e., Uncle Joe ignores your personal space boundaries, Nephew Sid who is guaranteed to throw a fit if he doesn't get what he wants, and Cousin Bob who always starts the drinking games to "get the party started". Don't forget the enticement of a drink offer, the sound of a cork popping out of a champagne bottle, the toast to the host and hostess.
3. Have a plan for the freak out that is bound to happen in your head. Can you predict what it will sound like. What will your thoughts be? If you can predict the thoughts, you can plan now when there is no desperation.
4. What's your escape plan? How are you going to regain your thoughts? Where are you going to go so you can allow an urge to move through you? Keep the commitment you have for yourself written on a piece of paper so you can reference it to honor yourself. Slip in to the bathroom to read it often.
5. If you decide to have a drink... what is your WHY? Is it a good why? What will happen if you drink? How will you feel before, during and after you drink? Shame, regret, low confidence? Really stop and listen to your answers.
6. If you do drink when not planned or drink more than you did plan, don't beat yourself up. Use the experience as a way to gain understanding about why you drank more than you wanted to. If you bury your head in the sand or if you talk negatively to yourself, you will only perpetuate your drinking habit. Be curious. Be a crime scene investigator and gather as much data as you can.
Think about what you'll gain and not what you are giving up.
you can do hard things
full human experience of all human emotions
Giving up: What you're really giving up...
Ground's Hog Day living
The more you practice going to events and uncovering your urges and not giving into them the quicker you will be the person your striving for. A person who is not controlled by alcohol.